Sarajevo – looking back on a challenging two weeks

Limited internet access and time meant I didn’t get to post another blog while I was in Sarajevo, and it’s been a whirlwind since I got back. But it means I’ve had a few weeks to recover, and been able to reflect and consolidate my thoughts and feelings before writing again.

To cut to the punch line, am I glad I went? Yes, definitely. It was a powerful experience, with highs and lows, and I learnt a lot in a very short time.

With Nadija, the Healing Hands
Manager in Sarajevo

The way of working is very different from home. All the booking of appointments and other admin is taken care of by Nadija, the manager, and Enisa, the outreach translator. So the other therapists and I just had to turn up in the morning at the clinic, or meet our taxi to the outreach centre, and the clients “magically” arrived. All we had to do was treat them – which was why we were there, and why I, and I think everyone, became a therapist in the first place. It seemed very straightforward and simple, and allowed us to focus on giving the best treatments we could. The flip side was that we gave a lot of treatments! Before I went out, I was worried how I’d cope physically. Would my hands be up to seven massages a day, nearly non-stop? Would I just be exhausted? Actually, I managed much better than I’d expected. I made sure I did a fair number of gentler massages like Indian Head and Thai Foot Massage in between the deep tissue work in order to look after myself, and was very careful with my posture and technique. It was a good feeling to realise just how much I could do, although I was always glad to put my feet up for a bit when we got back to the house in the evening!

Enisa at Hadjici Outreach centre

It was also an interesting experience to work with a greater range of bodies than I see at home, due to the injuries some clients had. It was a challenge as a therapist to work out how to treat a partially amputated or paralysed limb. The whole body is affected due to the imbalance that the injury causes, so sometimes the work needed is away from the most obvious problem. One lady had lost her left arm, and I was working mostly on her right inner thigh, which was in spasm.

Tuesday of my second week was my low point. I’d had one client on the previous day who’d really got to me – Eminna is only 28, and had been 8 when she was put into a concentration camp. She’d been shot, then her father had committed suicide. And then she got multiple sclerosis. Of course, that’s nothing to do with the war and happens to many people all over the world, but I couldn’t help wondering, hadn’t she been through enough? She spoke very good English, so I was able to communicate with her more easily than most, so I related to her more readily. That, combined with her age, was I think why her story touched me.

The treatment area in the clinic
ready for my next massage

Add physical tiredness on the Tuesday morning, and I was a little vulnerable to start with. It happened that I had a lot of clients with physical injuries that day – amputations, shrapnel, paralysis and horrific scars. One lady had injuries from a mine, and I knew from her file that she had lost half her right foot. I massaged her right leg, thinking that was the “bad” one, then moved on to uncover the other one. I then saw that her left leg had multiple scars, and gouges where tissue had obviously had to be removed. It shocked me more as I hadn’t been expecting it. It’s difficult to see that and not be moved by the suffering that had so obviously been endured. Of course, physical and psychological damage are not mutually exclusive, and we also saw people who were still carrying a lot of anger or anguish. Being low, I wasn’t shielding myself sufficiently from those emotions, and so was picking them up. As a result, at times that day I was struggling to hold back the tears as I worked.

That evening, I stayed in and rested, cooked something nourishing and read a very easy book that I knew would have a happy ending! So by Wednesday I was feeling stronger again and able to cope with my next seven clients.

At Ilijas Outreach centre

To counter balance that, on the same day I had a client who had lost her husband in the war, and been in a concentration camp. She had suffered from depression, which had worsened when her daughters left home. She told me she hadn’t wanted to have treatments when she was first referred to Healing Hands. Nadija had persisted and badgered her till she came in. Now, she says she doesn’t think she’d still be here if it wasn’t for the treatments. You can imagine how amazing it felt to hear that, and to be a small part of that process. Eminna also said that she had been in a wheelchair a few years ago; she is now able to walk with a stick due to the help she’s received from Healing Hands. In general, the people we saw were really appreciative of the treatments they receive, and all of us who travel to Sarajevo to give them. We received little gifts of fruit, pies or cakes most days from grateful clients.

At times it seemed that the problems in Sarajevo, or Bosnia generally, and the suffering of so many people, were too huge to comprehend or to begin to tackle. That was dispiriting, having gone out to help. Now I’m back home, with a bit of perspective, I prefer to think of the 65 people I massaged while I was there. For an hour or so at Healing Hands, they were looked after and cared for, listened to and tended. For many, I hope most, their pain was eased and their bodies soothed. I can’t help but think that that’s a great thing, and I’m proud to have been able to do it. 

The view from outside the
clinic, across the old town

I don’t know yet if or when I’ll go back. I’ll just see how things pan out, how I feel next year and what opportunities arise. My commitment to Healing Hands Network remains strong though, and I’m keen to get involved with some of the exciting projects they are developing here in the UK.

I didn’t quite raise the full £750 for the charity I needed to go out to Sarajevo, so it’s still possible to sponsor my trip through mycharitypage, or get in touch. You could also have a Healing Hands Massage – half of the price you pay goes to the charity; details are on my website. Any funds I raise above £750 go to the charity’s central funds to help develop their work further, so every penny is put to good use.

Find out more about the Healing Hands Network on their website - www.healinghandsnetwork.org.uk

Day 3 in Sarajevo

I’m currently in Sarajevo with The Healing Hands Network. Having arrived late on Saturday, I’ve had a day to find my bearings, a day in the clinic and a day on outreach. So time for some initial impressions, and photos.

Market in the old town

The old town of Sarajevo is very pretty, and a lot is pedestrianized so it’s easy to wander around. A fellow therapist here told me that last year a lot of the pavements were dug up, being repaired from (we presume) the shell damage they sustained in the war. Now they’ve been completed, but sympathetically with the surroundings. Sarajevo really does live up to its billing of being where East meets West – when I feel I’m in a Middle Eastern souk, something European jumps out as an incongruity, likewise looking at it as a European city there are exotic touches that stand out. In places it’s busy and vibrant, but you never need to look far to see the scars of the war, there are damaged buildings still, and shell marks in the walls. 

Reminders of the past

I climbed a little out of the centre by the river to get a better feel for the city's situation – and it really is stunning. To the north and south, mountains rise seemingly vertically, with houses clinging on to the slopes as they rise, and eventually giving way to deep green forest.

View over the city

On Monday I was in the clinic in Sarajevo, just round the corner from the house that we (myself and two other therapists) are staying in. The days all follow the same schedule – 4 clients in the morning, from 9.00 to 1.00, and 3 in the afternoon, finishing at 5.00. Then we get everything ready for the next day, and head home with a bundle of sheets and towels to wash.

The clinic in Sarajevo

Today I was on outreach, which means I travelled to a site out of the centre of Sarajevo to see clients there, in a borrowed room. There are 4 areas we visit throughout the week. The facilities were basic, but I was reminded of something my teacher in Thailand said. “A nice treatment room is lovely, but if the massage is good people will come back to a basic room; if it isn’t good they won’t come back to a lovely spa.” I hope the treatments I gave today justified the clients coming to visit us.

Some of the clients I've treated so far

Our clients come through the Concentration Camp Victims Association, the Civil Victims Association, the Mothers of Srebrenica and the Women’s Victims Association. They come with a variety of issues – some psychological, some physical (I saw my first bullet scar). Some of the problems are more familiar – back pain from working hard, or lifting children – there have been many years since the war and “normal” life exists here, but things are still very hard. Progress in rebuilding the country has been slow, unemployment is high, and many people are still hurting. One client was looking after her two grandchildren as her daughter is too ill psychologically to do so (and looking after her daughter).

So, 2 days done, and 12 to go (with a break at the weekend!). I’m tired, but now I’ve got the feel for how it works I think it’ll get a bit easier. So lets see what, and who, tomorrows brings onto my couch. 

Taster Massage Day in Berkhamsted

My trip to Sarajevo to volunteer with the Healing Hands Network is now less than a month away. That really has come around quickly!

In one of those small world coincidences, Carol Quirk, a Sports Massage Therapist who also offers treatments at BAYoga Studio in Berkhamsted, will be out there at the same time as me.

So we've decided to team up for an event at the Studio,  to fund our volunteer work with Healing Hands and raise money towards our flights and accommodation etc. 

Try Indian Head Massage
at the taster afternoon

On Saturday 25^th August between 1pm and 5pm, in the BAYoga Studio, Carol and I are offering 15 minute massage ‘taster’ sessions.  These will include seated back massage, Thai foot massage and Indian head massage.

In return we are asking for a donation to the charity, which will go towards our costs.

So please come along to support us on the 25^th, and bring a friend or family member with you!

For further information about Healing Hands Network please see this previous blogpost or go to www.healinghandsnetwork.co.uk 

To donate directly to mine or Carol's fund, please go to www.mycharitypage.com/carolquirk or www.mycharitypage.com/lucinda

Healing Hands Network Workshop

On Sunday, I went up to Berkswell, near Coventry, for a workshop with the Healing Hands Network (HHN). The idea was to find out more about the work they do in Sarajevo and what to expect when I go out there, as well as a chance to ask all my questions - and I had a lot!


HHN is a charity dedicated to the relief of suffering caused by war and disaster. Since 1997 volunteer teams of complementary therapists have worked in Bosnia, giving over 40,000 treatments. Their clients come through the Civil Victims Association, the Concentration Camp Union, the Centre for Torture Victims, and the Mothers of Srebrenica.


It was a fantastic day, and I left feeling much more confident about going to Sarajevo. I'm really fired up and enthused about the value of the services HHN offer, and I can't wait to become part of that in September.


The thing that struck me most was the clients' stories. I was young during the war in the former Yugoslavia, and struggled to understand what was happening at the time, who was fighting who and why. I certainly wasn't aware of the impact on the ordinary civilians until I became involved with HHN. When I went to Cambodia last year, I was deeply affected by what had happened there, the fact that it was during my lifetime, and many of the people I walked past on the street had lived through it. Although I am not trying to draw impossible comparisons between two situations, the siege of Sarajevo was more recent and much closer to home. Again I feel the sense of shock, of disbelief at what people have lived through, and a guilty relief that I haven't had to face that. The fact that, through HHN, I have a way to use my skills to reach out to a few people and make things a tiny bit better for them is, quite frankly, an amazing feeling. And it seems inconceivable to not go.


I just want to share a few of the quotes and pictures from the workshop with you, to try to explain why I am so excited about what HHN does.

I am a refugee from Eastern Bosnia.
I was held 1 year in a concentration camp.
I have damage to hips and legs from the regular beatings I received. 
I hardly sleep, nightmares haunt me still. 
I live with my son now as my husband died a year ago. 
I belong to CWV  (Civil War Victims) Association.
I am so glad to receive help from Healing Hands Network as their continued work has helped me to recover this far. 

My name is Hrzeta.

I was held at gunpoint in my home, along with my husband and brother.

They were shot dead.

I jumped out of a window to save myself, I though I was going to be killed too.

I broke my back- I was paraplegic for a long time.

I had to work for years to regain my bodily health and learn to walk again.

Healing Hands Network have been giving me Reiki and I have begun to work through my emotional traumas.

I am beginning to feel like a person again, and to lead a useful life thanks to this continued care.

Thank you from my heart for your wonderful work, kindness and support.

This is the first time Selma had slept for a long time.
Selma was in a concentration camp for 4 years, and still suffers nightmares about her treatment there. She suffers severe depression and it was affecting her family life. Her husband was concerned about her.
After her treatment session, she slept like a baby for half an hour! She looked totally different.
When she returned the following week, she had a big smile and a spring in her step that had been missing. She had turned a corner, due she claimed, to repeated therapies from HHN. 
She was coping better and was working again. Her family were pleased!

This lady was sitting at her table one day when a shell came through the window.  It took off her left breast, her arm from just above the elbow, and her abdomen burst open. Her husband even has to fasten the zip on her skirt – you need two hands.  

This is the outreach centre at Vogosca. HHN works through four such centres near Sarajevo, as well as the clinic in the city.









Of course, there's also the opportunity to get to know Sarajevo, and beyond, an undeniable draw for a travel nut like me. From speaking to members who'd been, it sounds like a beautiful city, which is gradually but perceptibly rebuilding itself after the devastation of the war. I'm told that the shopping is pretty good as well.


For more information on the Healing Hands Network, you can contact me and I'll do my best to answer your questions, or you can visit their website www.healinghandsnetwork.org.uk.